I have pushed myself, in the past day or so, to the point of two nervous breakdowns, one at one point where I was convinced that I've made the absolutely worst mistake possible, that New York hates me, that you hate me, that the rest of my friends hate me, and that I need to get the fuck out-move to ******, work at ***** for 22k a year and just live a miserable life.
I then...got really sick, and cried listening to the new Tori Amos album on repeat like five times.
So basically my last 24 hours have been akin to my high school experience, only at that point in my life I'd have induced the vomiting myself.
(It's worth noting that now's when I should repeat to myself "Panini Time")
It's not that things are bad-they aren't. I just feel like my parachute's the wrong color, like my cheese has been moved, like despite all my rage I may or may not be a caged rodent.
And so I am spending the next few days (gasp) offline. Disconnecting. Unplugging like I was Natalie Merchant, you guys were all the 10,000 Maniacs and this was MTV.
Basically hibernating and not being on the fucking internet and gathering my pieces back to center.
This may or may not include binging on the Tori Amos' Abnormally Attracted To Sin, it may or may not include my first trip to Coney Island. It will not include hot dogs.
Friends, Romans, Clients: you've all been notified. BEA is coming up, I have a bunch of projects that begin on Monday, and oh, next weekend is the next Resonator Magazine party.
So,if I were to not do this, I'd probably, by the middle of next week, end up shivering in a corner mumbling "Pinkberry BEA Pinkberry BEA" over and over again, drooling on myself and listening to Bat For Lashes on repeat.
So-no fbook. No twitter. Zilch.
When I return, I'll probably write like 18,000 words on the Tori album. You're stoked like the fires in my heart, I know.
(Oh, and you should read this. I wrote it for Creative Loafing's Summer Guide, and apparently it's really, really good. I don't know, I just realy like Meat Loaf. I intend on one day making my karaoke debut with my rendition of "I Would Do Anything For Love".)
Don't think it's slipped my attention that I blogged about not being online.
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2 comments:
I hope you enjoy your weekend, Russ. Great blog, as always. Outside looking in, I'd say that -- fraught as it may be with moved cheeses and miscolored parachutes -- you're going where you need to be. Hold fast. Here's to sittin' in breezes and listening to Tori....
I'm a little late to the party but, then again, I always hated arriving first.
I hope the unplugged time treated you well. We all need time off the grid just to remember we are human.
Loved your Meat Loaf story. I did see him in concert, you didn't miss much. U2 puts on a better show, even in an English field, surrounded by wee teens.
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